U.S. Office of Weights and Measures Report: Scales of Justice Need Re-Calibration

justicecalibrationNational Institute of Standards and Technology’s Office of Weights and Measures has released a blistering report today warning that the calibration certificate for the United States of America’s scales of justice expired several decades ago and is in dire need of readjustment.

Donald Toledo, weighmaster general, spoke “The most damning thing we’ve noticed is that the inaccurate scales are have very poor repeat-ability. Repeat-ability is a scale’s ability to show consistent results under the same conditions. We’ve found that the scales deviate wildly depending on measurable variables of the defense.

For instance, if a poor person or a minority were to be charged with crime X they would see wildly different results than a middle class person with all the same evidence, witnesses and experts. What’s even more alarming is if a wealthy person is accused of crime X they often do not even get charged and if they do the conviction rate is remarkably low and the sentencing is nominal.

We also fear that there may be a hole or thin spot in the blindfold justice wears that lets color through. – Donald Toledo

Further it seems that there is an unexplained tere weight that is placed on the scale for minorities before they even step onto the scale. It is as if the prison industrial complex, the gun industry, politicians and the news media have some vested financial interest in the repeated systematic vilification and conviction of certain groups of people. I know it seems implausible but our precision instruments show that this weight has gained mass every year. We also fear that there may be a hole or thin spot in the blindfold justice wears that lets color through.

In the cases of Alton Sterling and Philando Castile there is no trial at all. We fear that this growing imbalance will result in more frustrated protesters and more unhinged shooters like we saw in Dallas last night… and pretty much everywhere else in America lately.”

The office suggests postponing all trials while they work to repair the damaged infrastructure. The Department of Justice did not return respond to our request for an interview.

 

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