ISIS Leader Sprains Ankle in Precision Banana Peel Strike

isisslip

The White House released a statement this morning that they have delivered a devastating blow to ISIS communication network when they took out ISIS messenger boy Abdul-Aleem Haashim Qays Saabir Sayf Udeen Zaahir Yazeed Sulayman Taamir’s ankle in a targeted attack.

The United States has been deploying new experimental weapons such as the shoulder mounted whoopie cushion, fake poop dropping desert rovers and banana peel air strikes. “It’s more a tool to embarrass the enemy but we specifically targeted this man due to his high profile #42 ranking within the terror network, his brisk gait and his role as a messenger boy. We’ve struggle to keep the so-called Islamic state off of Twitter, YouTube and Facebook so we went after their traditional delivery systems” said Secretary of State John Kerry in a press conference to announce the successful raid.

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