NFL Courting James Deen as Porn Industry Cuts Ties

deendumbJames Deen, the infamous porn star accused of rape by several of his former co-stars as well as his ex-girlfriend, Stoya, has been dropped by porno production companies following allegations that he forced himself on them against their will.

Deen, has denied the accusations in a statement on Twitter, and no charges have been filed against him nor has he filed a defamation suit.

However, with so many companies breaking ties with the star and even suspending the release of upcoming titles featuring him it seems odd that the NFL, who had no previous relationship with the star nor has he ever played for an NFL team or shown any kind of interest in the sport, has been sending scouts to his home. One must wonder what does it say about America’s completely healthy and balanced obsession* with football when an industry considered sleazy and sexually exploitative seems to respect human life more than the nation’s most popular sport?

NFL spokesperson Chip Upsedurhed said in a press release “we have a long, proud history of giving multiple chances to men in positions of power over women, children or the weak and infirm yet find themselves in legal hot water because of their abhorrent crimes. Ben Roethlisberger, Dan Russell, Michael Vick, Mark Chmura, Ray Rice, Ray Lewis, Rae Carruth, we have about 600 pages worth of arrests from various players, a lot of them named Ray, and we’re proud to say thanks to our industry leading leniency many have used their fourth and fifth chances now have just as lucrative careers in the broadcast booth!”

“We hope to someday have the integrity of the adult film industry,” said Roger Goodell, speaking to gathered reporters as he hurriedly left his office and leaped into a running car waiting for him.

*ThisShouldBeTheNews is the official satirical news site of the NFL and reminds you to read responsibly.

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