Shock waves coursed through the GOP today as the “Merc with a Mouth” claimed John Kasich’s last spot in the Republican debate on Thursday, August 6th. The late surge is credited to the release of the hyper-violent, foul mouthed official Deadpool movie trailer on Tuesday.
The debate is scheduled to be televised on the Fox News Channel who selected the top ten candidates based on polling data to round out their panel.
The debate already promised to be a spectacular display of talking points, bullet points and finger points, even before the mentally unstable mercenary supplanted Kasich to enter the race. Inexplicably, Deadpool also assumed Kasich’s 3% of prospective votes. Capitalizing on the critical success of other gritty Marvel properties like Netflix’s Daredevil and a shaky leaked mobile phone video of the trailer from Comic Con earlier this year, Deadpool looks to be a serious contender in an already crowded, mentally unstable field.
When asked if his surprise entry into the debate and evidently the GOP race for the Presidency was a shocker, Deadpool said “Shocker? Buddy, I hardly even know her!” before wildly shooting his side arm into the air while making mock Yosemite Sam noises. John Kasich could not be reached for comment, or dinner, or anything.